Best Remedy for a Sapped Soul
It’s been a week since I came back from my heart wrenching trip to Japan. As heavy as my heart was landing at LAX, I was so grateful to return to the mountains where I’ve called “home” for the last year and a few months.
The very next day I nudged my husband, Kenny, to go up to Mt. Pinos to hike. In fact, I was pretty adamant about going there although I didn’t know why until I was there. Once I was on the trail hiking up to the summit where the Chumash considers the center of the world believing it to have a healing energy emanating. All I could know was that every cell of mine was ecstatic to be under the big blue sky, surrounded by the majestic trees, and serenaded by unidentified birds of the mountains. We both soaked up the sun laying on top of the mountains being brushed by a gentle breeze that blew across the mountain range. Only then did I realized my time at my mother’s tiny apartment in a fairly dense residential neighborhood was indeed difficult, that my heart and soul were really “sapped” by the time I came back.
It was indeed the best thing I could have done to reground and recharge my whole being that day. When I do guided meditations, I often say, “Be like the vast blue sky and let the thoughts come and go like clouds floating across.” I had so many thoughts and memories coming and going as I hiked the trails — obviously about my mother who is still holding onto her precious life, about my family of origin and all the history and dramas that come with it. A big part of me was questioning my choices I made in my life since I left Japan in early 1980s. Was it the right decision for me to stay in the U.S. to pursue my dreams and not return to Japan to be close to my family so I could help them when they needed me? Although I know it will take a while to process and digest all that I went through and all that I’ve discovered, I started to feel more convinced I’ve done the best I could and started to have a glimpse of peace about the decisions I made in my life.
They say “forest bathing (shin rin yoku)” is good for you. They’ve been recognizing that for more than 3 decades in Japan. As Buddha taught, the direct experience counts the most, which is how we develop faith in our practice. I am grateful to have an easy access to the forests let alone a mountain known for its healing energy. What best remedy could I have to practice mindfulness and replenish my depleted soul?