Acceptance
There was a popular book titled The Road Less Traveled published in 1978, though I didn’t encounter it until the ’90s. The title came to mind because it’s the topic of Dharma talks this week by Gil Fronsdal for the daily morning practice. As I tried to recall the book, I realized I’d never actually read it. I only got as far as the first line: “Life is difficult.” At the time, I was in my 30s, living a full life that included its fair share of hardships, and I couldn’t bring myself to accept that statement. Sure, there were challenges then, as there are now, but I’ve never liked thinking of life as a static state of being difficult.
Now, realizing I never read the book, I’m intrigued. I decided to revisit it but had to browse it online since I gave my copy away years ago. It turns out, it’s definitely up my alley! The first paragraph after the “life is difficult” statement explains that accepting life as it is can bring freedom: “Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.” This feels like a message from my higher power, as I’ve had several conversations about acceptance recently. The AA Big Book also echoes this idea: “Unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy.”
Acceptance has been on my mind because there are things in my life I’m struggling to accept — or, more honestly, things I wish were different. But I also understand that where I am now is the result of the decisions I’ve made along the way. While I wouldn’t say I’ve made any bad decisions, I sometimes think that if I knew then what I know now, I might have chosen differently. My journey hasn’t been extraordinary, but it may have been a little less traveled. I’ve tended to do things a bit differently, though I wonder: Did I act differently because I felt different, or did I feel different because I acted differently?
Mindfulness practice also centers on acceptance — embracing each moment as it is, with equanimity. It’s interesting to see how Buddha, Scott Peck, Bill W., and countless others have arrived at this same conclusion. It’s such a simple truth, and yet, I must admit, it’s not always easy.